Shall we look at the top 4 valid and real reasons for divorce in your marriage?
‘Divorce is the one human tragedy that reduces everything to cash’. Rita Mae Brown
You never really want to end your marriage. You want it to last till the day you live. But sadly in this hectic and mercenary world interaction with your spouse is very tensed and stressed.
Your dreams of everlasting happiness in marriage are often belied as things do not happen as you expected. You are emotionally shattered when the love you had for each other soon loses its sheen and glow.
In today’s marriage scenario, you divorce at the drop of a hat.
- You do not like your spouse- you divorce
- You do not like his\her habits- you divorce
- You are bored with your marriage- you divorce
- Your tastes and wishes differ- you divorce
- There are ego clashes between you- you divorce
These are all silly and often ridiculous reasons for divorce. It is sad that you do not understand marriage in its proper perspective. You do not have the patience to make your marriage work.
- ‘Should I tolerate every mistakes of my spouse?’
- ‘What if he\she makes my life dangerous?’
- ‘What if he\she deserts me for another woman\man?’
- What if my spouse has maniac behavior?
Your questions do have a point! There is always a borderline to any relationship. Marriage relationship is no different.
There are certain dos and don’ts’ in marriage.
When you lead a life of physical and mental torture, you cannot live with your spouse. When behavior of your spouse exceeds the limit of human decency, it becomes a valid reason for divorce.
It is very true you should make your marriage work at any cost. When you break your relationship for innocuous reasons, you make a mockery of the institution of marriage. But when things do not have a chance to work in your marriage, there is nothing you can do about it.
Top 4 valid and real reasons for divorce
1. Completely drawing away from each other.
Indifferent attitude can kill your marriage. Love and care cements your relationship. But callous and unsympathetic behavior of your spouse proves a valid and real reason for divorce.
What are the aspects that make your marriage intolerable to survive?
- There is no communication between you.
- You do not have physical relationship.
- You do not want to be home when your spouse is there.
- There is no mutual respect.
- There is no commitment between you.
- You are not supportive and protective.
Can you see how you miss all the essential ingredients of married life?
What happens if this is the scenario of your marriage?
- Your children suffer for no fault of their own.
- They become withdrawn and taciturn at a very young age itself- a danger signal of future complexities waiting to develop.
- You are mentally abused.
A valid and real reason for divorce!
2. Infidelity is yet another valid and real reason for divorce
‘The bitterest experience in my life was when I saw my husband with another woman’ my friend lamented. ‘He had been living with a woman behind my back all these years. I can never forgive him’.
They had been married for twenty two years. But her husband make a mockery of their marriage by being infidel. My friend filed for divorce. She had a valid and real reason for divorce.
If there is one thing that worst hits a marriage, it is unfaithfulness. When you are faithful to your spouse, you expect the same from him\her. The love for your spouse grows and thrives when he\she is loyal to you. You feel emotionally bonded because you are sure that your spouse belongs to you.
But you are emotionally and mentally shattered when your spouse betrays you. You are all the more upset when your spouse has another family. You cannot and should not digest it. If your spouse betrays you and leads a sly life with another person, you have a real and valid reason for divorce. You should not tolerate bigamy at any cost.
3. Desertion proves a valid and real reason for divorce.
My mother had a friend whose husband left her and to this date has not returned. Since she belonged to the old school of traditional outlook towards marriage, she remains married to a person who never was a family to her.
But the generation of today will never tolerate such desertions.
When your spouse deserts you just like that you should never accept it. You should file for divorce as your spouse does not deserve you.
Why should you waste your life for some who has left you in lurch to fend for yourself?
When your spouse does not live with you as a family you have a valid and real reason for divorce.
4. Maniac behavior
This is the worst type of marriage you live through. It is more horrific than physical abuse as your spouse shows tendency of psychopath behavior. He\she uses weapons to hurt you and derives vicious pleasure when he\she sees you in pain. He\she loves blood-spattered confrontation with you and thinks up ways to torture you physically.
It is dangerous to live with such a spouse. You should immediately withdraw from such a meaningless and dangerous marriage. You should also complain about the torture you underwent to the concerned authority so that your violent spouse does not go in search for another prey to satisfy his\her maniac tendency.
‘There is a rhythm to the ending of a marriage just like the rhythm of a courtship- only backward. You try to start again but get into blaming over and over. Finally you are both worn out, exhausted, hopeless. Then lawyers are called in to pick clean the corpses. The death has occurred much earlier’. – Erica Jong
Can you see the valid and real reasons why some marriages cannot survive?
It is tough to revive marriages where there is no love, care, concern and decency. Marriages which have violence, physical and verbal abuse, cheating, desertions are better ended and annulled, than endured and tolerated.