Emotional abuse makes your married life very stressful and tensed, doesn’t it?
It is because emotions rule your relationship. When your emotions is respected by your spouse you enjoy a good married life. But when your emotions are abused by him\her your married life dives into failure.
Do you feel marriage gives you all rights over your spouse?
Do you think you can abuse your spouse and get away with it?
Your rights over your spouse has its own restrictions. There should be a respectful dividing line when you interact with your spouse. When you exceed your limitations your married life slowly loses its sheen.
When you misuse your marital rights it is point-blank emotional abuse.
It shatters the sensitivity of your spouse to the extent that he\she begins to resent you. When you crush the emotions of your spouse your relationship plunges into utter chaos.
Marriage does give you certain rights over your spouse. But it in no way gives you rights to be emotionally abusive.
Your marriage can survive only when there is certain restrictions in your interaction with your spouse.
There is definite limitations to the level of advantage you can take over your spouse.
Why is it so?
Imagine a country without a border!
Imagine a school without rules and regulations?
Imagine a work place without any restrictions?
It will be utter chaos and confusion everywhere – A free for all with everyone doing their own thing.
This is the reason why there are restraints everywhere in the world. In actual fact it is this dividing line which makes the world more civilized and cultured. Otherwise we might as well be living in a forest.
Are you wondering what this has got to do with your marriage relationship?
It has everything to do with it.
Marriage too has its own rules and regulations.
- You cannot think you have all rights over your spouse just because you are married.
- You cannot take your spouse for granted and thrust all your anger on him\her.
- You cannot emotionally abuse your spouse and think it will not affect your married life. He\she too is as human as you.
- If the indifference of your spouse angers you, yours angers him\her.
- If you resent the harsh words of your spouse, he\she feels angered by your bitter words.
Emotional abuse has dreadful repercussions in your marriage relationship. It literally tears your relationship into shreds. The abuse you spit out makes your spouse feel resentful and hostile towards you.
Initially the hostility is muted and easily overcome. But when you persist in abusing your spouse it slowly snowballs into a terrible marriage wrecker.
What are the types of emotional abuse you display in your married life?
- Indifferent attitude towards your spouse.
- Selfishness to have things done your way
- Not caring about the hurt your unthinking words inflict on your spouse.
- Not being supportive – emotionally and financially
- Taking derisive pleasure in making fun of the appearance of your spouse.
- Not being communicative – this is one form of emotional abuse most of you face in your marriage.
- Spending hours in social media while your spouse longs for some attention and interaction from you – the latest form of emotional abuse most modern marriages experience.
It is very easy to let go your married life, but very tough to make it work. It is sad that you never realize that marriage is hard work. Your professional life is very easy to handle. You have particular regulations which you have to follow. When you follow it you are successful in your work.
But marriage relationship is entirely different. The rules and regulations change according to your emotions. And emotions are very fickle and ever-changing.
How to deal with emotional abuse in marriage? Has shattering impact
Never degrade your spouse.
Never take him\her for granted.
Inform your spouse about your decisions – Keeping him\her in the dark about you is the worst type of emotional abuse.
Apologize for hot and hurting words uttered– A sincere apology makes your spouse forget the hurt inflicted.
Do not be too commenting and criticizing – Your spouse hates it.
Do not leech your spouse off all his\her money –Financial abuse.
Do not snoop into his\her social media account – Worst sign of emotional abuse – Suspicion.
Never thrust your work tension on your spouse – He\she has nothing to do with it.
Realize your boundary line. Understand that your spouse is an individual. So he\she owes respect from you. Give respect and take back immense love from your spouse. Avoid emotional abuse to sustain the love in your married life.