Do you know emotional insecurity makes your relationship very unsure and uncertain?
It makes you mistrust and disbelieve your spouse.
You need emotional security to make your married life content and comfortable.
When you do not trust your spouse, you have all sorts of doubts about him\her.
- Does he\she truly love me?
- Is he\she faithful to me?
- Why is he\she always late from work?
- Is my spouse lying to me?
- Is he\she having fun behind my back?
- Will he\she cheat me?
- Will my marriage survive for years?
It is true doubts like these have no foundation. But it shakes the very foundation of your married life because emotional insecurity makes you assume all your doubts are true and valid.
Continuous procession of doubts about your spouse plague you. You gradually lose your peace of mind.
Doubts about your spouse makes you argue and fight with him\her. You also feel emotionally drained. You imagine the worst for married life.
- You doubt the love of your spouse and feel nervous of the stability of your relationship.
- If your spouse is late from work, you are sure he\she is having fun with someone who had caught his\her fancy.
- You doubt your spouse is hoarding money without your knowledge.
Emotional insecurity makes you distrust every action of your spouse. In the process you make both unhappy and miserable.
Doubts arise only when you are unsure in your relationship.
Implicit trust is the most valuable characteristic that lays a strong foundation to the longevity of your marriage. When you are sure of your spouse, you are emotionally secure. You do not doubt each and every action of your spouse.
Do you know it is easy to doubt your spouse?
But very difficult to build trust.
Don’t let your emotional insecurity destroy your marriage – Avoid it at any cost
Shall we see how?
- Trust your spouse
- Clarify your doubts directly.
- Accept the explanations of your spouse.
- Do not spy on him\her.
- Never ask suspicious questions.
- Interact with your spouse openly
- Develop transparency in your relationship.
- Inform your decisions to your spouse.
- Explain your actions to him\her.
Here are some more tips.
Do not cling to your spouse for your emotional security. You feel hurt when he\she is not up to your expectation.
Having impracticable and impossible expectations about your spouse kills your happiness and makes you feel emotionally drained.
Never expect the rosy atmosphere of your love days to continue forever. You feel utterly lost when responsibilities makes your relationship practical and mundane.
Have enough breathing space in your relationship. This makes your bond flourish and thrive. Plants thrive only when there is enough space between them. It is the same in marriage also. Do not expect your spouse to be at your beck and call always.
When there is transparency in your interaction, both have confidence about each other.
Do not have a fixed mindset wanting your spouse to behave in a way you like. You will invariably be disappointed. Remember there is always a gap between your expectation and reality.
Love your spouse wholeheartedly. But do not be obsessed by him\her. Obsession makes your married life a hell.
‘The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make- not just on your wedding day, but over and over again- and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife’. – Barbara De Angelis
Emotional insecurity makes your married life stumble fast towards failure. The hardcore fact is both are individuals. So be bonded with love and not with emotional blackmail.