Do you know that certain marriage disasters can make your married life terribly agonizing and nightmarish?
It is true that a marriage without problems does not exist. But when you have the support of your spouse, you face it with perseverance and guts. You take your family issues in your stride as you gather immense mental strength from the backing your spouse gives you.
But some marriage disasters turns your married life into a battle of survival.
You do face many problems in your marriage, but not every one of them leave a scar in you.
But marriage disasters destroys your mental stability and makes you a nervous wreck.
What are some marriage disasters that emotionally shatter you?
- Debts- It shatters your self-esteem and you are terrified to face the world.
- Extra marital flings- You are emotionally devastated when your spouse is disloyal to you.
- Illness-You are traumatized when your spouse\children fall sick with a deadly disease
- Loss of your job or that of your spouse’s – Unemployment tears the financial status of your family into shreds
- Death of a family member- You just want to disappear from the world than to endure the loss your precious one.
You find it very difficult to hold your relationship together when you face such emotionally draining problems. Most modern couples find it easy to annul their marriage when such relationship disasters crop up.
Shall we now look how marriage disasters destroys your relationship?
1. Debts make your marriage struggle
When you are knee deep in debt, blaming game between you begins. You accuse your spouse to be reason behind the financial debacle you face.
And your spouse is quick to point out how you are the culprit behind your monetary disaster.
Interest from the money you borrow eats up into your budget leaving you with no money for your essential spending.
You no longer can afford to eat out, buy new clothes, or plan a vacation. When your natural and normal wishes are not fulfilled, you want to get out of your marriage, as you are sure your spouse is the culprit.
You feel frustrated that you do not have money for your basics. And you are terrified when the telephone bell rings. It might be the lenders! You literally cringe in helpless terror.
Solution!
Now is the time you should join hands with your spouse. He\she needs your support drastically.
You should think and act firmly. You should have a frank discussion with your spouse and find the loopholes through which your money is draining and plug them.
You should tell your children that they too have to adjust for a short period. Assure them that when the loan was done with, they can enjoy all the good things in life. When your entire family rises to the occasion, you can get rid of your debt steadily.
2. Extramarital affairs wrecks your relationship like a sledgehammer
Loyalty and faithfulness makes your marriage stable and long lasting.
But when your spouse finds another person more attractive than you, and crosses his\her border, it causes incredible bitterness and anger in your relationship.
You lose the love you have for your spouse when he\she daringly has an affair. And the lost love cannot be retrieved that easily. Your tears of anguish make you hardened against your spouse and you hate to live in the same house with him\her.
Infidelity is something which can never tolerated by you, isn’t it?
When your spouse daringly has an affair behind your back, you wonder bitterly about the meaning of the love you had for each other.
Everything about your relationship loses its luster and all that is left is hatred and revulsion.
Solution!
Extra marital affairs are the worst possible destroyer of your relationship. The attraction for another person is very short lived and temporary.
Can any affair last on physical attraction?
No!
Definitely not!
Most out of extra marital affairs are invariably physical and not emotional.
Do not destroy your marriage for something as fickle and feeble as physical attraction. If your love for each other is unflinching, both cannot think of another person in your life.
Fight against such unsteady relationship and lean towards your spouse to strengthen your marriage with your sustained love and care.
3. Illness of your dear ones
This is yet another traumatic marriage crisis.
You love your family ardently, don’t you?
And when your spouse\child falls sick with a life threatening disease, you feel your happiness has ended.
Everything else goes out of focus and your terrified mind literally screams in agony to see your precious one suffering.
Your life turns upside down and you forget your laughter.
The never ending medical bills, your inability to look after your family, depleted money, and the resultant work stress take a toll of your peace and you just want to disappear from the world.
Solution!
It is indeed tragic that you have to undergo such a marriage crisis. But your sick child\husband needs your care and support so much that you cannot afford to sit down and cry. When you are mentally shattered, you will be unable to look after your sick child\spouse.
You should pretend to be courageous even if you are not. Comfort your child\spouse with words of reassurance and encouragement.
4. The loss of your job shatters your self-esteem
When you are unemployed before marriage, it affects only you. But to be out of your job when you are married is altogether a different situation.
You have many financial commitments which cannot be met by the money earned by your spouse.
You also feel that your spouse has lost his\her respect for you because of your inability to contribute for the betterment of the family.
You do not have money for your personal expenditure also. Your tiny wishes go unnoticed and uncared by your spouse.
It injects a sense of inferiority complex in you. You also easily pick up fight with your spouse assuming that he\she does not respect or love you any longer.
Solution!
During the recent recession, many corporate companies did away with many employees as a cut back into the expenses.
An Indian couple showed how love can overcome any hurdle. When his wife lost her job, the husband was not flustered. He too resigned his job and along with his wife started a catering business, as his wife was an expert cook. Now they have a flourishing business and earn lots more than what they were earning.
This is how your love for each other should be – Not letting down your spouse!
5. Death of a family member makes you lost forever
When you lose a precious member of your family, life stands still for you. You feel devoid of any happiness and your heart aches at how God could be so cruel. You shrink yourself into a shell and become gloomy and miserable.
Solution!
Life never stops for anyone and goes on and on. You have other members of your family to look after. You should understand that your sorrow reflects on them also. You should be spiritually close to the departed soul and make yourself courageous to look after your family.
Conclusion
Do you think it is happiness and peace that strengthens your relationship?
No!
Every couple can be happy and peaceful when the going is good. But tough times are the real test to the love you have for each other. When you let your spouse suffer alone when there are problems, your marriage is a failure.
But, when you hold his\her hands to fight out your marriage disasters, your relationship can survive any hardships that might come your way. This is what true love is all about.
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