Why do couples divorce?
After all they marry out of intense love for each other, don’t they?
The answer is simple.
It is the curse of modernity that has crept into married life. Couples have a lot of aggressive questions against their spouse in modern marriages.
Why should I do it?
Why can’t you do it?
Why are you irresponsible?
Why are you uncaring?
Why should I listen to you?
These sort of accusing questions is a common scenario in modern marriages.
If so, you could be heading towards divorce.
Too much questioning and too much accusations makes couples divorce easily.
1. Couples divorce because of extra marital affairs
Cheating is the number one cause for increased level of divorce you see today. You betray the trust of your spouse when you cheat him\her.
When you are disillusioned by your spouse you instantly feel attracted to a person whom you feel fulfills your expectation. You forget you are married. You jump into extramarital affair without thinking of the repercussions.
Your spouse feels completely shattered when he\she comes to know of your cheating. The inevitable happens – divorce ends your marriage.
2. Couples divorce for money
Are you stunned?
Money is also one of top reasons for divorce because both have diversified views about it.
- You want to save money, while your spouse wants to spend at will as he\she lives for the day.
- You are committed to the financial needs of the family while your spouse never cares about it.
- You spend for the family while your spouse spends for himself\herself.
Such contrasting views and actions about money makes you hostile and resentful against your spouse.
You could have easily solved your money related problems if only you had talked it out with your spouse. But you never have the patience to do it.
Your differences of opinion about money transforms your relationship into a war of bitter words and accusations between you. You give so much importance to money that your family relationship takes a back seat.
You fight with each other about money matters till one fine day you feel you cannot take it anymore. Your battle about money takes you to the divorce court.
3. Couples Divorce because they are intolerant
Surprisingly your intolerance level against your spouse is alarmingly high.
- You find the habits of your spouse irritating.
- Your different upbringing makes you clash for almost everything.
- You want your thoughts to be implemented in the family while your spouse also feels the same.
- You interfere into the personal space of your spouse which makes him\her hostile towards you.
You never realize that your spouse cannot be your Xerox copy. Instead of adjusting to each other you fight like enemies which finally ends your marriage.
4. Couples divorce for disappointed expectations
You have many dreams about your spouse. Invariably your dreams is based on the idealistic expectations you have about him\her.
But after marriage your expectations come crashing to the ground. You are brought to the harsh reality that your spouse is not what you imagined him\her to be.
Here are some of your unfulfilled disappointments.
- You thought your love days would continue forever – It doesn’t.
- You thought your spouse would always be loving and caring -He\she isn’t.
- You thought your spouse would be instantly supportive in your times of need –He\she never really cares about it.
5. Couples divorce when they outgrow each other
Your love soon loses its sheen as you easily outgrow each other.
- You do not find your spouse exciting anymore.
- In fact you think he\she is a drag.
- You do not have anything to talk to him\her.
- You do not like to spend time together.
- You rarely have sex.
- Whenever you are together you argue and fight.
You feel too oppressed to allow your marriage to continue. You want to end it immediately. The simple fact is that both have out grown each other. Though you stay together you never see eye to eye in anything.
Have you heard of the proverb ‘Familiarity breeds contempt?’
This is what happens to your marriage. When you live with your spouse 24\7 you find your married life monotonous and dull. Instead of reviving your love you go in for a divorce.
The above problems can be solved if you have a frank talk with your spouse.
Physical abuse, psychopath spouse, and impotency – these are very valid reasons for divorce.
Do you throw away your dresses easily?
You darn it and use it. But you never mend your struggling married life. You just throw it away.
Before marriage you saw only the positive aspects of your spouse. But after marriage you see only his\her negative characteristics.
Never make divorce an easy option for a way out of your marriage. Make your marriage work and don’t end it in a court. Legal separation is more of an amputation. You are never the same again.