Marriage problems makes you a nervous wreck, doesn’t it?
You are mentally exhausted by the never ending procession of problems you face in your relationship. It seems to consistently come to destroy the happiness quiotent of your marriage.
You dreamily wish that all your marriage problems to disappear in a moment, don’t you?
But it never happens – not even in your dreams.
There is not one single couple who enjoy a perfect marriage in this whole world.
The picture perfect celebrities who give loving poses also have immense marriage problems.
The Royals also have problems in their marriage.
So, never think that you are the only one suffering from marriage problems.
What happens to your relationship that the sheen and shine of your love wears off very easily?
Why does your marriage become complicated and complex?
The answer is simple!
It is you who make your relationship complicated by giving undue importance to its negative aspects.
Are you breaking your head about the ways to solve your marriage problems?
Here are some super easy solutions
1. Never, complicate your relationship
You have many work related problems which makes you feel stressed and tensed, doesn’t it?
But, you are not emotionally affected by the behavior of your colleagues\boss\higher officials.
Why?
Because you have only professional relationship with them. The stress you feel in your work place does not mentally shatter you, as your interaction with them is business like and superficial.
But you cannot say the same about your marriage. You are emotionally battered when you have marriage problems. Unlike your relationship with your colleagues in your work place, your relationship with your spouse is highly emotional and sensitive.
I am sure most of commit these relationship blunders in your married life.
- You are angry with your spouse for innocuous reasons.
- You easily become bitter and resentful against your spouse.
- You clamor for rights without realizing your duties.
- You take literal meaning to the words said by your spouse in a spurt of anger.
- You make much ado about the minor faults of your spouse.
Can you see how you complicate your married life?
Apply a break to your emotions before it destroys your relationship. Accept the harsh fact that your spouse will be different from you. So, never try to change him\her according to your liking. It never happens.
Accept your sposue for what he\she is.
2. Bid goodbye to unrealistic expectations
You dream that your married life would be full of love and laughter. But in reality, your relationship often experiences rough weather. You are baffled by the negative aspects of your spouse. You are utterly disappointed when your idealistically imagined spouse is very normal, dull and totally different from the person you saw during your love days.
Are you wondering how to tackle such tricky marriage problems?
- Be emotionally grounded.
- Do not expect too much from your spouse.
- Accept him\her as he\she is.
- Tolerate the minor faults of your spouse.
Understand that it takes many years before your marriage settles down to normalcy.
3. Spacing is the essence of a good relationship
Your spouse is an individual. He\she needs his\her own privacy. Do not even dream of entering into the personal zone of your spouse. This creates intense anger and resentment in his\her mind.
- Allow your spouse do things as he\she wants to.
- Do not breathe down the neck of your spouse 24\7.
Personal spacing is very important for your relationship to survive.
Ask any successful couples the reason behind their happiness. Their answer is invariably- spacing.
Yes, spacing forgoes many problems in married life.
4. Never, extend your arguments
Arguments and fights are common among couples. But digging up old fights is a big no. It instantly conveys the message that you had been harboring resentment about your spouse so far. This is one of the biggest reason for marriage problems.
- You extend fights for days.
- You want to emerge the winner.
- You want to prove that your spouse is in the wrong.
- You drag the family of your spouse into your fight.
- You do not talk for days.
- Your mind relives the bitter words spoken by your spouse repeatedly.
- You make negative comments about his\her appearance- a very sensitive topic.
Forget your arguments immediately. Do not drag it on and on until both feel hostile towards each other.
5. Never, allow third-party intrusion
Do you run to your parents with a complaint list about your spouse?
- Utter blunder on your part.
Do your parents come to your aid by arguing with your spouse on your behalf?
- Utter blunder on their part.
You do not need another person to advice you about your relationship. Both are mature enough to know the ways to make your marriage happy and stable. Third party intrusion turns your relationship ugly.
SUM UP OF THE SIMPLE SOLUTIONS TO YOUR MARRIAGE PROBLEMS
- Acknowledge that your spouse is an individual and so has his\her own unique whims and fancies.
- Overlook irritating habits of your spouse. It is not a big issue.
- Have beautiful spacing between you.
- Be supportive.
- Never be too demanding about your rights – a sure backfire.
- Do not dig up old fights to add strength to your new fights.
- Let bygones be bygones.
- Respect your spouse for what he\she is.
- Do not snoop on your spouse.
- Do not bring in your children into your arguments.
- Accept the hardcore fact that the frenzied love of your dating days will never exist after your marriage.
- Never ask for a third party mediator to solve your marriage problems. [ It makes your problems even worse]
- Be practical when there is a need.
- Be very loving and understanding, as your spouse needs it.
- Never ever, outgrow your spouse.
- Do not fleece your spouse to the last penny.
- Do not treat your spouse high handedly.
- Do not be dominating and controlling.
- Do not try to take control of the hard-earned money of your spouse. It inevitably snowballs into a relationship killer.
CONCLUSION
“Work on your relationships… Relationships need renewal or they die.” – Bo Sanchez
Demands and more demands makes your marriage stressed and tensed. Impractical and unrealistic expectations makes your married life highly disappointing.
Understand that marriage problems are part and parcel of any relationship. Realize that you are not enemies to battle for supremacy day in and day out. Know that you are in the same team. This is the reason the success of your marriage depends on both.
Sena says
Thanks for your articles..Will love to read more..
Mathi says
Thank you!