Many a time you feel you are being taken for granted by your spouse, don’t you?
This is the worst aspect in your relationship which makes you feel bitter and resentful throughout your married life.
When you marry your spouse, you have certain expectations about him\her.
What are the basic expectations you have about your spouse?
You expect appreciation and encouragement for your relentless contribution for the betterment of your family.
But when your spouse coolly overlooks your contribution as a part of your essential duty, you feel enraged and furious at his\her callous attitude.
Why do you feel so?
Because your spouse smugly feels you are only doing your duty.
Great injustice to you, isn’t it?
Your insensitive spouse also has one law for himself\herself and another for you.
Your blood boils in furious anger at the unfairness of it, doesn’t it?
Your spouse is never thankful for whatever you do for the family. It can be cooking, helping in household chores, or looking after the children.
How do you assume you are being taken for granted by your spouse?
- There is no appreciation.
- There is no acknowledgement.
- There is no thankfulness.
Your spouse just shows plain complacency and acceptance about whatever you do for him\her.
Overlooking you and feeling that you are just doing your duty is what taken for granted means.
A death knell to your relationship.
You too are a culprit in taking your spouse for granted.
- You want your spouse to do things as you want to.
- You take arbitrary decisions without consulting him\her.
- You force your views on him\her.
I am afraid your spouse also feels he\she is being taken for granted.
Wrong on both sides.
What should you do to avoid this unwanted feeling of being taken for granted in your relationship?
Both assume that your love days will continue throughout your married life without the essential qualities of appreciation and gratitude.
Worst ever mistake.
How will you feel if your spouse sits back with cool acceptance as he\she feels you are only doing your duty?
You feel mentally tired and drained.
You drift away from him\her as your duties are taken for granted.
Just sit back and analyze the differences in your relationship before and after marriage!
You will be amazed to find how much your relationship has undergone drastic changes.
The scenario before marriage
- Both easily made up when there were arguments.
- Both took pains to look good and attractive.
- The time you spent together was humorous and full of fun.
- There was so much to talk about.
- Both thanked each other for everything.
The scenario after marriage
- Both become egoistic after marriage.
- Both become complaining.
- You let go your appearance.
- There is no fun element in your married life.
- There is no appreciation –just smug acceptance.
- The onus of duties and commitments is one-sided.
- Both never demonstrate love for each other openly.
Why this drastic changes in your relationship?
Because both take each for granted.
When there is no thankfulness in your married life it is no longer exciting.
Slowly and surely boredom and dullness settles down in your interaction.
What should you do to overcome the terrible impact taken of granted has on your relationship?
- Nourish your relationship by appreciating and acknowledging your spouse.
- Never make negative comments about him\her.
- Never make household chores one-sided.
- Never criticize as if you are perfect.
- Understand that you too are duty bound.
- Never let go your appearance.
Let us suppose you sow a seed.
What happens if you do not water it?
The seed withers without sprouting.
But suppose you water it.
It sprouts out vigorously.
But when you leave the sprout unattended, it dies.
But when you keep giving it continuous nourishment, it branches out, takes root and finally yields you fruits\flowers.
The seed is like your married life.
Watering the sprout is like nourishing your relationship.
Persistent care of the sprout is like the sustained care you show to make a success of your marriage.
Water your relationship with appreciation and thankfulness. If you do so, your married life never bores you. Both never feel you are being taken for granted. It is as simple as that.
HAVE YOU EVER FELT THAT YOU HAVE BEEN TAKEN FOR GRANTED BY YOUR SPOUSE?
Share your thoughts with us.