Do you know your happiness depends upon how mentally detached you are?
Is being mentally detached that important?
As a human being you are emotionally attached to your spouse, kids and parents. You literally live their lives. Their happiness is yours. Their problems make you stressed. Your love for them is so deep that you expect the same reciprocal love from them.
But it does not happen.
You are emotionally shattered and devastated
‘If you truly want to be respected by people you love, you must prove to them that you can survive without them.” – Michael Bassey Johnson Why do you depend on others for your happiness?
A grave mistake you always make.
Never do that.
Be mentally detached.
Does it mean you should not love your precious ones?
Not at all. Love them. But do not be too involved.
Top 5 ways to be mentally detached – Gives you peace
1. Forgo worrying
You should realize that everyone is an individual with their way of living their lives.
- Do you worry sick about the future of your family?
- Do you feel you can be happy only when your spouse is demonstrative of his\her love and care?
- Do you work yourself threadbare for their well-being?
- Do you always think about them?
- Are you too emotionally involved about them?
- Do you feel you cannot exist without them?
You are doing it all wrong.
Your children are individuals who know the way to lead their lives. They can take care of themselves. Even if you advise them they are not going to listen to you.
Your spouse is also an individual who needs his\her own spacing.
‘I worry because my love is too deep’ you defend yourself.
Love your precious ones. But stop worrying about each and everything about them. Makes your life hell. Step away from their lives. Be mentally detached to understand that you cannot live their lives.
2. Think about yourself
Are you too selfless that you do not think about yourself?
Never do that. When you forego all good things in life in your focused concentration about your family you are time and again disappointed. When your love and selflessness is overlooked by them you are emotionally broken.
You feel lonely and lost.
Are your family in any way the reason for your sadness?
They are not. They cannot be responsible if you cling to them for your happiness.
- Think about yourself.
- Live your life as you want to.
- Indulge in things you like.
- When you lead your own life you gradually become mentally detached.
3. Take a step back
When you are mentally detached you do not cling to your children\family for attention.
You take a step back and let them be what they want to be.
When you do this you become emotionally strong that you never feel helpless when your children leave you to lead their own life. Mental detachment makes you acknowledge the fact that they are individuals who have their own life to lead.
When you take your children’s freedom in your stride, your life is normal and usual.
If on the other hand you feel that they do not love and respect you anymore, your life becomes torturous. You feel emotionally drained.
Never do that.
Love your children, but be mentally detached to let go them when they are mature enough to look after themselves.
4. Day to-day life also needs mental detachment
Is being mentally detached important in your day-to-day life also?
- Always take a third-party view of your problems. It makes your life lot easier to live.
- Your emotional demands plays culprit in all your wrong decisions and hurt feelings.
Shall we see an example?
Has someone rammed into your brand new car?
You are livid with anger. But mental detachment makes you rational to acknowledge the fact that the accident was not intentional. You utter a few harsh words at the person who damaged your car. You immediately forget the incident. Your concentration shifts to repair your car.
But suppose you took to your heart that your precious car has been damaged?
You come into blows with the person who damaged your car. You take him to the court.
Do you achieve anything out of your emotional outburst?
Your hypertension shoots up, nothing else.You were temperamental because you became emotionally charged when your brand new car was damaged.
But mental detachment makes you cool enough to know that insurance can take care of the expenditure of repairing your car. There ends the matter.
Analyze your daily life. You find that you wreck your mental peace by flaring up for unnecessary reasons.
5. Your marriage also needs mental detachment
Do you cling to your spouse for your happiness?
- Both feel suffocated.
- When you are practical you acknowledge that your spouse is an individual.
- You also know that he\she has every right to have certain breathing space.
- So you stop breathing down the neck of your spouse.
Spacing gives your married life the much-needed fresh air of goodness. Be mentally detached to give your spouse the much-needed independence. An easy way to make your married life tension free.
Be mentally detached to retain your sanity and balance in life. Draw away from clinging to others for your happiness. Become emotionally independent. Lead your life with self-respect and steady mental equilibrium.