The struggles of modern marriage is very tough indeed.
You have many problems which we of our generation did not face.
- In our days, we readily accepted the rules of marriage without questioning it. Now, you set your own rules and regulations for your relationship.
- We did not clamor for rights as you do. Your voice for rights is very vociferous and aggressive.
- We did not face the rat race you now face. Our lifestyle was very calm and routine.
- We did not need the money you need now. You do not have enough money, however much you earn.
- We did not have ego clashes as you do now. Nowadays both are very egoistic and self-centered.
So, your changed lifestyle brings along with it many struggles into your relationship.
Modernity has made your marriage very demanding and challenging. The struggles of modern marriage have made modern couples feel tensed that their relationship is working as they expect it to be.
Here are the varied struggles of modern marriage – Very valid and not imaginative!
1. You struggle to deal with your hectic lifestyle
You now lead a hectic lifestyle, quite unheard of during the yester years. You have tons of work related tension.
During yester years, woman stayed back to look after her family. She had the patience which a modern woman can never dream of. But, she also had rest which a modern woman do not have.
During yester years, man had his wife to look after his needs. So, he coolly wore the crown of being the head of the family. But, it is no longer so. Since his wife is also working, modern man has lost his position as the head of the family.
The poor man cringes inside with frustration at his lost post as the non-questionable head of the family.
A good standard of living has become a compulsion in this modern society. You have to rush through your life to keep pace with others. So, naturally you are fatigued and drained.
One of the topmost struggles of modern marriage is stress and tension. This makes you lose patience to understand your spouse better. You just do not have time for it.
2. You struggle to deal with the lack of compatibility
Yester year couples had no worldly exposure. So they were satisfied with their marriage. They had no great expectations, and so they had no great disappointments.
But, modern couples have more worldly exposure. They have many expectations. They compare their life with others and find many things they dreamed of missing lacking in their relationship.
Yes.
Yet another valid reason for the struggles of modern marriage is unrealistic expectations.
3. You struggle with the need to earn tons of money
The struggles of modern marriage are very varied and unique.
Yester year couples were satisfied with the money they had.
But, the modern couples do not seem to have enough money. They want more and more money to satisfy their ever-growing need to own the luxuries world offers them.
Yes!
Luxuries of yester years have become the basic needs of the modern couples.
So, they run after money. They fight about money. They divorce for money. Money has become an awesome force in the life of modern couples.
4. You struggle with lack of sexual interest
As your overload of work takes toll of your energy, your sexual interest keeps diminishing.
When you lose interest in sex, it paves way to unhappiness in your relationship. Though you forgo sex, you feel deprived and lost at the lack of physical proximity with your spouse.
Because, sex is not about the physical urge between you. It has a definite cementing effect in your marriage.
Sex is something you enjoy only with your spouse. And so it is unique and special.
When sex disappears from your marriage, you struggle to hold your relationship together.
5. You struggle with divorce
During the yester years, divorce was very rare. Couples adjusted for the sake of their children and also out of fear for the society.
But modern couples never worry about such things. They are not bothered about the society.
They do not have patience. Their tolerance level is alarmingly low. So, they easily throw away their marriage, just as they do with the things they do not like.
CONCLUSION ABOUT STRUGGLES OF MODERN MARRIAGE
As a modern couple, you earn tons of money and have tons of struggles also. But, most of your struggles is the byproduct of your unwillingness to adjust to your spouse.
After ending your marriage, you feel shattered that you could have made your marriage work. More like crying after the milk has been spilled, isn’t it?
SMK says
Hi Mathi madam,
Thanks for this article!!
This article is an eye opener for all the current generation. When I talk to people of current generation about marriage – for most of them marriage is mere legal paper but it should have love. But none of them understand that to develop love both the people have to put effort. And for that both have to invest sufficient amount of time, both should have patience and tolerance.
And another point i’d like to make is about the current trend of so called – “Couple Goals” which people take reference from celebrity couples or from people who look great on social media.
Instead of understanding and developing their own couple goals, people are borrowing it from other couples without even understanding how those couples have reached that level of understanding.
In my understanding people want more freedom, space in their life than a proper marital affair.
Mathi says
Hi,
You have clearly understood the struggles of modern marriages. Today, most couples are more focused on money than on improving their love. They never understand that money can never replace love. Everything is going out of hand in the name of modernity. It is time couples woke up to make their marriage work. Thank you for your comments.