Your wife says one thing and means another thing, doesn’t she?
She often talks in such a round about way that you do not really understand what she is implying. You feel all confused about what your wife exactly wants to convey to you.
As a man, you want your wife to directly tell you what she wants from you. It will make you feel more comfortable and relaxed in dealing with her.
You cannot always be reading between the lines, you know. And you do not have the capacity for that also. You always like direct talk. But strangely, your wife is never direct.
In fact, there are many a time your wife says one thing and means another thing.
“Why can’t my wife be blunt and frank in expressing her feelings?” you often break your head about the ambiguity of her words.
What makes you more direct and blunt than your wife in expressing your views?
As a man, you are basically not emotional. So, you never really care for the sensitivity and feelings of your wife.
Do you know your practical attitude makes your wife feel that you are too unemotional for her liking?
Let us suppose that you do not want to do certain things, your wife asks you to do.
You instantly say ‘I will not do it’ without feeling any guilt.
But, your wife is not made like that.
If your wife is unwilling to do what you ask her to do, she will convey the message in a completely different manner.
She will never say, “I will not do it” as you did.
She will say “are you sure you want me to do it?” your wife actually means to say that she does not like doing what you are asking her to do.
Can you see how different your wife is in reacting?
She has many hidden messages in the way she talks to you.
Yes!
Your wife says one thing and means another thing because she wants you to understand her hidden messages on your own.
While your interaction with her is always matter of fact, your wife’s way of interacting with you is always emotional, with lot of adjectives added to it.
Are you wondering why your wife says one thing, but means another thing?
Then you must understand her womanly mentality.
Your wife is very emotional. She needs open display of love from you. She wants your spontaneous support more than anything else.
But, you never give her the emotional support she needs. You do not listen to her. If at all you listen, you never properly understand what she is implying.
- Your wife will convey her love for you directly to you.
- She will show her appreciation towards you directly.
- She will make you feel loved directly.
But, she will never show her fears and apprehensions directly. She wants you to understand it.
Shall we see how your wife says one thing and means another thing?
- “I don’t know how I am going to handle it” – This words convey the message that your wife is feeling overwhelmed with family problems.
- “Do you want me to do it now?” –These words convey the hidden message that she is overworked with her never-ending tedious household work.
- “Are you sure you will remember it? – The hidden message of your wife is that you are ever forgetful about family duties.
- “If you say so” – Your wife is actually saying that she disagrees to your suggestions.
- “Are you sure you know what you are doing?” – Your wife shows you that you are doing it wrong.
Your wife also shows her anger against you in different ways.
- Your wife says, “It is fine with me” when you give her some ideas. – She actually means that she does not like your suggestions.
- Your wife says “I think it is time we talked”- She means she cannot handle the situation any longer and it is time to fix up things.
- She says “The kids were asking for you”- Your wife actually means that you do not spend enough time with your family. She wants you to be more present at home.
- Your wife says, “Do you like the show so much that you are watching it non-stop?” – She is implying that you are glued to the TV instead of talking with her.
- She says, “Can I trust you do it?” – She is simply saying that she cannot trust you.
- Your wife says, “Will we be able to manage with the money we have?” – Your wife means you do not have enough money.
- She says,“How much will your new mobile cost?” – She actually means to say that your mobile is in good condition. She is asking you why you want to waste money in buying a new one
- Your wife says “My friend appreciated my cooking” – She means that others appreciate her, whereas you don’t.
CONCLUSION
Since your wife says everything in an indirect manner, you are all confused about what is going on in her mind.
Do you know when your wife realizes that you really understand her needs; she would never indulge in indirect hinting?
So, the main cause for her roundabout way of talking is you. You never really show your appreciation for her. You make your wife feel overlooked. You never empathize with her feelings. You never offer solutions for the problems she faces and let things to drift along.
Your behavior hurts your wife terribly. She does not know how to convey her feelings to you.
So, she indirectly says words that confuse you. But in between her words lies her true feelings about the situation.
When you do not value her opinion, your wife is hurt. This is the reason your wife says one thing and means another thing. She exhibits her hurt by indirectly voicing her thoughts. Listen and empathize with your wife if you want her to talk with you in a more direct manner.
Richard Turner says
What rubbish.
A woman never says what she wants and expects you to read between the lines. She doesn’t want you to read between the lines when you suspect something is a miss, all of a sudden it’s black and white. Women have made themselves not worth the hassle, they think they are better than men but get found out pretty quick as they are not.