You often indulge in mind reading your spouse, don\u2019t you?<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Though you do not mind read your spouse with the intention of finding faults with him\\her, it leaves behind a trail of unhappiness, unwanted resentment and misunderstanding between you.<\/p>\n

What exactly is mind reading your spouse mean?<\/p>\n

It is assuming your own meaning to the words uttered by your spouse. It is also construing your own interpretation to his\\her behavior. And often your assumption is all wrong and off the target.<\/p>\n

Yes!<\/p>\n

You assume twisted meanings into the words your spouse innocently utters. But you feel that your mind reading your spouse is perfect and right on target because you assume that you know him\\her very deeply.<\/p>\n

“I think my husband has stopped loving me” Sindu, my friend’s daughter told me.<\/p>\n

“Why do you feel so, dear?”I asked her confusedly.<\/p>\n

“Well aunty, he usually keeps on communicating with me. But, nowadays he has withdrawn from me. Even when I talk to him, he replies in monosyllables” the young girl looked tearful.<\/p>\n

“Did you ask him about it?” I asked Sindu.<\/p>\n

“Why should I ask him aunty? I know it. He has stopped loving me. There can be no other reason for his changed behavior” Sindu went on dejectedly.<\/p>\n

“Sindu is assuming things, aunty. Of course I communicate with her as before. But of late she is gossiping a little too much about my relatives. So, to avoid confrontation, I don’t make any comments. But otherwise I am pretty normal with her. Just because I do not encourage her gossiping she is assuming that I have stopped loving her” her husband smiled wryly.<\/p>\n

Do you know the reason behind the unhappiness of Sindu?<\/p>\n

She was mind reading her husband according to her assumption.<\/p>\n

Do you know this habit creates unwanted problems in your relationship?<\/p>\n

Why?<\/p>\n

You often mind read your spouse the wrong way. You never know what he\\she really thinks without asking him\\her.<\/a><\/p>\n

But you never ask your spouse about what he\\she was thinking. Instead, you presume many things about your spouse based on your assumptions. Your assumptions are often wrong.<\/p>\n

Assuming things about him\\her according your mindset is called mind reading your spouse.<\/h2>\n

When you keep on assuming biased meaning to the moods of your spouse, your mind reading is completely out of focus.<\/p>\n

\n
• You mind read that the moments your spouse is silent as indifference towards you. But to him\\her, it is a natural need for some private moments.<\/li>\n
• You mind read that the anger of your spouse is an open show of hatred towards you. But to him\\her, it was a momentary flash of temperament. It had everything to do with the situation your spouse was in. It had nothing to do with his\\her love for you.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

  When the mind of your spouse is preoccupied with other things, it is natural he\\she overlooks your expectations. It is a very normal human behavior. But you would not let it go at that.<\/p>\n

  You go all out to prove that your spouse is neglecting you. You work yourself with anguish that your marriage is heading towards failure.<\/p>\n

  When you do not understand the behavior of your spouse, you never clarify your doubts with him\\her. Instead, you indulge in mind reading your spouse.<\/h3>\n

  You feel that you know your spouse so much that you can understand what is going on in his\\her mind without asking him\\her about it.<\/p>\n

  It is true that you get to know your spouse better as years go by. You understand what he\\she feels from his\\her body language and also through his\\her facial expressions.<\/p>\n

  Facial expressions are obvious and open show of emotions. But, it does not exactly reflect a complete picture of the feelings your spouse has about you. It reflects what he\\she feels about you at a particular moment. Nothing else.<\/p>\n

  You also expect your spouse to mind read your expectations. When he\\she never understands what you really want, you feel he\\she is unloving and uncaring.<\/p>\n

  Why can\u2019t you directly express your needs to your spouse?<\/p>\n

  \u2018If my spouse truly loved me, he\\she would know what I need without me confessing about it.\u2019<\/p>\n

  This cat and mouse game in your relationship is the outcome of your mind reading your spouse.<\/a><\/p>\n

  You expect your spouse to behave in a particular way to feel his\\her love. When his\\her reaction is different from your expectation, you conceive too many biased meanings into his\\her normal behavior.<\/p>\n

  You never realize that the emotions of your spouse keeps changing according to the situation he\\she is in. it invariably has nothing to do with the love he\\she has for you.<\/p>\n

  Suppose your spouse is preoccupied with other things, he\\she might overlook what you need at that moment.<\/p>\n

  There are times when your spouse might not be communicative. You are angry by his\\her behavior and you assume that he\\she does not like to talk to you.<\/p>\n

  You do not try to understand that your spouse might be having some work related problems and so feeling all tensed up.<\/p>\n

  He\\she wants some silence and privacy while you fume that he\\she is drifting away from you.<\/p>\n

  A mistaken mind-reading!<\/p>\n

  When you do not talk it out with your spouse, you place your assumptions as an X-ray to penetrate his\\her mind.<\/p>\n

  When you keep on assuming new angles to the moods of your spouse, you always mind read wrongly.<\/a><\/p>\n

  Why do you want to mind-read your spouse instead of directly asking him\\her about it?<\/p>\n

  Modern marriage is very egoistic. You want the explanation to come from your spouse.<\/p>\n

  \u2018Let him\\her tell me what his\\her problem is. If he\\she doesn\u2019t, I will naturally assume my own angle to it and I cannot be bothered if I am wrong.\u2019<\/p>\n

  Conclusion<\/p>\n

  “Great relationships are based on clarity, not mind reading” – Steve Arterburn<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

  Mind reading your spouse is a negative aspect in your marriage. If you do it consistently, it destroys your marital happiness.<\/a><\/p>\n

  When you constantly mind read your spouse you assume the worst about him\\her.<\/p>\n

  Why?<\/p>\n

  You always imagine and decide the character of your spouse as your mood dictates.<\/p>\n

  This is not the way to live your married life. Your relationship should be frank and open if you want to enjoy it. It can be possible only when you clarify your doubts with spouse directly and not by assuming what he\\she thinks according to your imagination.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  You often indulge in mind reading your spouse, don\u2019t you? Though you do not mind read your spouse with the intention of finding faults with him\\her, it leaves behind a trail of unhappiness, unwanted resentment and misunderstanding between you. What exactly is mind reading your spouse mean? It is assuming your own meaning to the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false},"categories":[1230],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n