Shweta,
You have got a great advantage on your side. You say your husband is very understanding and caring. You are indeed lucky. The differences in your income does not matter if your love is strong. As for your husband not being ambitious this is a common attitude of many men. They are very mechanical and unthinking about their career. They earn and think they have done their job.I think your husband also feels so.
But he will definitely become more committed to his work as years go by. Your husband is not your worry from what you have written.
It is your in laws. They are feeling emotionally insecure because of you. Since you have more rights than them over your husband it is making them feel insecure. This is the reason they are instigating your husband against you. You should never allow it to happen and keep silent. They have no business to humiliate you.
No one can insult you unless you allow them to. Your in laws have no right to mold you according to their taste. You are an adult and have every right to live according to your wish. Never allow them to take over your life.
Living in a joint family will never work in this modern world. It is always better to live away from your in laws and have a cordial relationship with them, than to live with them and hate every moment of it.
You should talk to your husband about moving away from your in laws. Don’t think it will happen immediately. It might take time but you have to make the first move. When both live separately you will find many positive changes in your married life. You will tolerate your in laws when you do not have to face them daily. You deserve your freedom. Good luck.

I am a great admirer of your blogs, I have a read a lot of them also.
Wanted to share something about my married life, hope you will provide me suggestions/solutions about it.

I am 30 years old working professional employed in MNC. I got married around a 1 and half year back, via an arranged marriage set up. Though guys family was well settled and everything was as per our requirements, I compromised on the income of my husband and was not established also. He earns at least half of what i get, it didn’t mattered for me then. I thought money doesn’t matter, we will make it work out.
But little did I realised that its just not salary, career determines outlook of the person also. After marriage I got to know that he doesn’t wants to grow only, doesn’t want to work hard, doesn’t have any goals.
There was no way out, so I thought I will make him understand all this in due time.

On the positive side, he is very caring, loving, understanding and completely adorable husband, eventually I fell in love with him.

But the flip side is, he is not mature. He can’t thinks of anything on his own, is totally dependent on his parents. After 3 months of marriage, his parents started using him against him. Though I am not sure what they want out of it, he is only son of his parents !!!!

My in laws being very conservative, wanted me to mold me according to them. So they would feed him with talks against me in morning and evening (he leaves late and returns early from office than me). This lead to sour relationship between me and my husband. I am of the nature who never says back anything to him, I would keep silent and ultimately it was a sour relationship between me and my in laws. I never back fired or said anything to anyone. My in laws are very manipulative people, they notice minor issues about me and tell it to my husband. Basically my mother in law wants to control me. They are of the opinion that i don’t ADJUST according to them.

Now it has come to a point that I really don’t want to spend time with my in laws though I love my husband dearly. They constantly abuse me, humiliate me. I am fed up maam. I don’t feel like even speaking to them. I can’t take it anymore, its taking a toll on my health and career.

I don’t want to take it to my parents,

Suggest what should I do. I really want this relation to florish.