When you are sexually abused by your husband, you are enraged by his insensitive behavior, aren’t you?
Though you are furious at the insensitivity of your husband, you do not discuss your apprehensions with him as you feel he will misunderstand you.
There are times you confront your husband about this. But he never agrees that he is sexually abusing you.
Your husband never understands why you feel so keyed up about his normal sexual needs. Instead, your husband accuses you of not understanding his male needs.
“After all I am her husband. Do I not have the right to fulfill my sexual needs?” your husband feels his sexual behavior with you is normal, and not abusive.
But you feel sexually abused by your husband when he never really cares for your physical needs.
You are also angry when your husband behaves as though it is your prerogative to satisfy him sexually, whenever he feels like it.
You feel that this is the height of the selfishness your husband has about the physical aspect of your relationship.
When your husband is sexually selfish and insensitive, you do not like to be physically intimate with him.
You are indignant that your husband never really bothers to sexually satisfy you.
Physical intimacy is important to both. And your physical needs should be fulfilled by your husband. And you are obliged to fulfill the physical needs of your husband.
Only then can both enjoy your sexual life.
But when your husband is only concentrated on his physical needs, you are naturally enraged.
Are you justified in accusing your husband as being sexually selfish?
You are indeed justified.
Your approach towards sex is entirely different from that of your husband.
To your husband, sex is purely his physical need.
But to you, sex is an emotional need.
When your husband does not understand that you need to be emotionally aroused to feel sexually aroused, you are physically dissatisfied in your sex life.
This is the reason, you often feel your body is used by your husband to fulfill his sexual cravings, without caring about your emotional needs.
When are the times you feel sexually abused by your husband?
1. Your husband never cares about your tiredness
As a dutiful wife and a loving mother, you have two duties to fulfill.
You work yourself threadbare for the betterment of your family. And you are compelled to slave 24\7 to fulfill your family duties.
Needless to say, your body literally aches with pain and tiredness. Your mind screams for some sleep.
In your tired days, sex is far away from your thought.
You want your husband to understand your tiredness. But when your husband is in a sexual mood, he never cares about your tiredness.
Your husband callously insists on sexual fulfillment from you. Your reasoning about your tiredness falls to deaf ears.
Though you agree to the physical demands of your husband, you do not enjoy his love making.
In fact, you feel agonized that your husband is using your body as a means to be sexually satisfied.
2. Your husband is sexually selfish
Your husband never cares about your sexual fulfillment. He makes love to you, without making you feel feminine and attractive.
Your husband makes love to you in a hurried way, as if he had other work to do.
You long for the loving kiss of your husband. But you do not get it.
You long for the caress of your husband. You do not get it.
You long for your husband to look into your eyes with love and desire.
But your husband scarcely look at you.
It might be a stranger making love to you.
Naturally, you become resentful about the insensitive attitude of your husband.
3. You are denied sex when you need it
Your selfish husband is very concentrated on his own sexual needs. When you are in a sexual mood, he coolly ignores it, as he is not in the mood.
You show your sexual needs through your eyes. But your husband does not notice it.
You dress seductively for your husband. He overlooks it.
You eagerly wait for your husband to come to you.
Your insensitive husband coolly turns over to sleep.
You feel terribly upset and wounded. Your night turns tearful and weepy. You feel your husband has made you feel unattractive and unappealing by ignoring you.
4. He does not behave affectionately
To you sex is an emotional act. You want your husband to convey the message that he finds you very attractive.
How?
By his actions. You want your husband to talk to you after having sex with you. He never does.
You want your husband to kiss you affectionately to show his physical fulfillment.
Your husband does not have the inclination to display these small, but much needed physical gestures you emotionally crave for.
You want your husband to say how much he enjoyed having sex with you. He does not.
You feel emotionally upset when you are sexually abused by your husband because of his non interaction.
5. He does not utter endearments
The silence of your husband when making love, makes you feel he might as well be having sex with a prostitute.
Your husband does not say you are beautiful. He does not say you are giving him pleasure.
When your husband does not utter endearments, you do not feel the emotional satisfaction which sex should give you.
CONCLUSION
Can you take it lightly when you are sexually abused by your husband?
You should not.
You should definitely talk with your husband about it. Do not feel sensitive about talking about your sexual needs.
Understand the simple fact that you have the same right towards sexual fulfillment just as your husband.
Leave a Reply