Why does snooping on your life partner happen?
When there is no trust in your relationship, you indulge in snooping on your spouse. But sadly, when you spy on your spouse, you do not understand about its devastating impact in your marriage.
When you pry on your spouse, it just means you have doubts and suspicion about him\her in your mind. Your spouse dislikes it, when you snoop on him\her. Likewise, you too dislike your spouse snooping on you.
Then how does snooping happen in your relationship, in spite of both disliking it?
When trust bids goodbye from your relationship, you indulge in snooping on each other. So, snooping is the byproduct of distrust, that has crept into your relationship.
When you trust your spouse, you do not feel suspicious about him\her. You are absolutely sure that your spouse would not cheat you, and he\she is sure that you would not betray his\her trust in you.
When such trust exists between you and your spouse, your married life is free from needless suspicion. When your relationship is free from unnecessary distrust, there is lot less tension between you. You feel relaxed by the trust you have in your spouse so much so, that you enjoy being married to him\her.
But when you are suspicious about your spouse, you have all sort of doubts about his\her loyalty towards you. When your doubts get more and more embedded in your mind, you start snooping on your life partner, to clarify your misgivings about him\her.
You do not indulge in snooping on your spouse, all of a sudden. Certain behavioral changes in your spouse, kindle many suspicious doubts about him\her in you.
- Your spouse suddenly acts too private and secretive towards you.
- Your spouse changes passwords of his\her social media accounts.
- Messages are deleted from the mobile of your spouse.
- Your spouse spends too much time away from you, which is quite unusual to you.
Your spouse has a new friend from the opposite sex, with whom he\she spends hours talking in the mobile, that it makes you feel suspicious. When your spouse keeps his\her voice low and secretive while talking in the mobile, you again feel doubting alarm bells ringing in you.
You are sure, that the secretive behavior of your spouse is an emphatic sign of a relationship he\she might be having, without you being clueless about it.
When the behavior of your spouse become too secretive and too mysterious, you become paranoid with doubts. You feel apprehensive, that your spouse might be hiding something from you.
When your doubts that your spouse might be cheating you takes root, you want to confirm it any cost. You feel you have no other go, than to begin snooping on your life partner.
When you become suspicious about your spouse, you begin to act like a spy.
- You check the emails and messages of your spouse, with the sole intention of catching him\her red-handed.
- You check the bank account of your spouse, to clarify your doubt about whether he\she is spending money on someone.
- When your spouse goes out, you enquire his\her friends about his\her whereabouts.
- In extreme cases, you hire a detective to spy on your spouse.
When you verify the activities of your spouse with his\her friends\colleagues, you are making your suspicion about him\her open to everyone. By openly snooping on your spouse, you make your personal life a hot topic to be gossiped by your friends\relatives.
You also make yourself sick with misery, when others give you many misleading information about your spouse. When you check the mobile phone or emails of your spouse, it clearly shows how much trust is missing in your relationship.
Snooping on your spouse might seem justified to you, as your mind wants relief from the doubts and apprehensions you have about him\her. But when you want your doubts to be clarified by others, you will often be misled by the wrong information they give you.
When you believe the biased evidence about your spouse, it might be difficult to retrieve your marriage.
Snooping on your life partner does not in any way give you the true picture of what is happening, unless you clarify your doubts directly with him\her.
Prying on your spouse is not the way out to clarify your doubts about him\her. Instead of snooping on your spouse, you can directly ask him\her about your doubts.
Unless your doubts about your spouse are proved to be authentic and real, do not ever confront him\ her. When you confront your spouse about your hazy and unconfirmed doubts about him\her, you will only make him\her furiously angry.
You should not try to clarify your doubts with your spouse, when your emotions are all heated up and keyed up, as your words will spit out your venomous anger.
When you begin your enquiry, your spouse instantly realizes that you had been snooping on him\her behind his\her back. Your spouse becomes angry and resentful, if your accusations are wrong. On the contrary, your spouse will go on the defensive if you are right.
Indulging in spying and snooping on your spouse is an extremely ominous signal, that your marriage has lost its trust. As you well know, your marriage cannot survive without trust.
Trusting your spouse is an absolute must to enjoy your marriage, without feeling apprehensive about his\her loyalty. The root cause of your suspicion is lack of openness and transparency in your relationship.
If your relationship with your spouse is friendly and open, both would discuss just about everything happening between you. When your relationship with your spouse is frank and open, there is no secrecy between you.
Everything about your spouse is like an open book to you. Everything about you is an open book to your spouse. When such open friendliness exists between you, you interact with your spouse about your doubts and misgivings about him\her, without making your relationship strained and tensed.
Snooping and spying might make a movie or a story interesting. But it is not good for your relationship with your spouse, as it will only make your married life struggle to survive.
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