You find living with an insecure husband a nerve-wracking experience, don’t you?
When your husband is insecure, your married life becomes an emotional battle to you. When you have to constantly combat with the never-ending insecurities of your husband, you find it impossible to find happiness in your relationship.
There are times you want to say enough is enough.
Your insecure husband aggravates your agony further by being dithering and wavering about everything in his life.
When your husband is insecure, he has an unstable mind. He is not confident. He does not know how to control his emotions. He is not jovial. Your insecure husband is so possessive about you that he hates leaving you out of his sight.
Your husband is not possessive about you out of his love for you. His possessiveness stems out of his doubts about your love for him. Your insecure husband feels that if you mingle with other men, you might be attracted towards them.
So, your insecure husband literally clings to you in the name of love. You often find the love of your husband overwhelming and suffocating.
Your husband has such mood swings that you do not know what to expect from him. You have to time and again pacify your insecure husband about his never-ending doubts about your love and about your commitment towards him.
Even if you give your husband explanations and clarifications about his doubts, he turns a deaf ear to it. He also makes your life a living hell by being unreasonable and irritating.
Your insecure husband’s behavior can at best be described as childish and silly. A confident and mature man never behaves like him.
You nearly want to give up on your husband, don’t you?
But your love for your husband makes you pull along a marriage which offers you nothing.
Marriage is not an easy joke. You have loads of responsibilities to fulfill. There are tons of problems that needs to be solved.
When your husband is confident and mature enough to share family problems with you, you feel relaxed and comfortable because you have his support as your crutch.
But your insecure husband has nothing to offer you. Since your husband lacks confidence and assertiveness, his behavior is cowardly and spineless.
Your husband holds himself away from family problems as he does not have the intelligence to handle it. So, he selfishly wants you to deal with whatever problems that might creep into your family.
When your husband acts as though family problems do not concern him, you are at your tether end not knowing how to handle the situation.
Yes!
Your insecure husband coolly holds himself aloof from family responsibilities as he does not have the mental grit to face it.
Let us first analyze the reasons behind the insecurity of your husband.
If the childhood days of your husband had been abusive, he would have perpetually lived in constant fear of his abusive parents.
The fear instilled in him by his abusive parents, make your husband so puny in character that he grows up gutless and cowardly. And as your husband grows, his insecurity grows along with him.
After marriage, he thrusts his insecure feeling on you and makes your life gloomy and miserable.
Yet another reason for the insecurity of your husband might be his persistent failures. His continuous failures might have made your husband lose his confidence and boldness to face life in its harshest.
Now let us see the traumatic signs that clearly show that you are married to an insecure husband.
1. Your husband is not confident
When your husband is feeling insecure about his life, he behaves in a cowardly manner.
He never mingles with your friends\relatives\colleagues as he fears that his interaction would display his lack of communication skills.
He becomes gloomy and pessimistic at the drop of the hat.
Even the mildest of family problem is enough to make your husband jittery.
Your husband never tries for his success, as he is sure he would fail if he tried anything new.
He shies away from meeting people and spends most of his time at home, without any social activities.
2. Your husband wants you at his beck and call
Your insecure husband is very possessive about you. Not out of love.
Your husband has no one other than you, who will bear with his insecurity. So, it is always you who has to be at his beck and call.
You might want to go to meet your friends. But your husband has many doubts about it. The insecure feeling of your husband, makes him want you to be at his side always.
He never allows you your personal space.
Your husband never wants you out of sight. You do not enjoy any social activities, as your time is spend in making your husband feel that you think only of him.
3. Your insecure husband can be very rude
Your insecure husband knows that he does not match the intelligence or success of his friends\relatives\colleagues. This makes him build up tons of resentment within him.
In his pent-up feeling of pessimism, you become his punching bag. Your husband abuses you about your appearance, your way of doing your work and just about everything you do.
Your husband uses abusive words to relieve himself of the tension that builds up in him due to his lack of confidence.
4. Your husband is always accusing
Your insecure husband feels that he is always right, and you are always wrong. Though your husband knows that he is no good, he accuses you of being no good.
Your husband makes you feel that you are the sole reason behind whatever problems your family might face.
When you spend money on a new dress, your husband calls you a spendthrift.
When you want him to help you in household chores, he accuses of thrusting all your work on him.
When there is a financial problem, your husband accuses that you are incapable of managing money matters.
The accusations of your husband is endless, as it is his means of soothing the raging discomfort he feels because of his insecurity.
5. Your husband is very abusive
A decent husband will never abuse his wife. But your insecure husband abuses you to vent his frustrations and resentments.
Whenever he faces problems in his workplace, he becomes so abusive that you find it impossible to handle him.
When he has his mood swings, you find it impossible to handle his temperamental tantrums.
Conclusion
“A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.” – Robert A. Heinlein
Can you see how your insecure husband makes your married life a boring experience?
Never bow to the unreasonable demands of your husband as you will be left with nothing in your life.
But do not isolate your husband too much away from you, as he will feel he has nothing in his life which is worth happiness.
Balance between being a loving wife and having your personal space so that you retain your individuality.
You will find it tough, but you have no other go than do it if you want your marriage to survive.
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It is a comprehensive relationship channel which deals with many of the relationship issues couples face.
Here is the link to my channel!
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNrT3KOkTU5ITQMyYnVsxGQ
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