If you are a working woman, I am sure you feel guilty that you are a negligent mother, don’t you?
It is very natural you want to stay back at home and look after your child.
After all, you are a loving mother, aren’t you?
But your family financial commitments force you to work. And the time away from your child is nerve wracking to you.
You are compelled to leave your innocent child in the day care and you feel restless whether he is being looked after properly.
Your husband adds fuel to fire by making unwarranted comments that you are not up to the mark as a mother. Both often fight about sharing your parental duties.
You are furious when your husband coolly plumbs himself before the TV\laptop while you slog alone with your energetically mischievous child.
Your bones ache with tiredness. There are times when you want to just lie down to have your well needed rest, but you are unable to do so.
When you feel tired with overwork, you often yell at your child to keep calm. You also do not have the stamina to spend quality time with your child.
But are you really a negligent mother?
No.
You are not.
In fact, you are a sacrificing mother.
- You are working threadbare to give the best for your child.
- You are working for the financial security of your family.
- You are working to share the financial commitments of your husband.
So, you should be proud of your ability to be a loving mother and a supporting wife.
He should fulfill his duty as a father of your child, mustn’t he not?
Never let him escape his parental duty.
What should you do to relieve you guilty conscience that keeps accusing you that you are a
negligent mother?
- First, take off this unwanted feeling away from your mind. Unless you do it, you cannot have a moment of peace.
- Learn the trick to balance between work and family.
- Leave your work related tension right in your office. It has no place in your home.
- Never have a backlog of work and bring it home to finish it. You will feel stressed and tensed.
- Spend quality time with your child.
- Never watch TV and lose precious time which should be spent with your child. A happy home atmosphere is the best gift you can give your child.
- Never pick up petty fights with your husband and leave your child terrified and frightened.
- Take your child out often so that he can enjoy himself.
- Look directly at your child when you are talking with him. Most of you have your eyes fixed on the TV\laptop while you talk with your child. You never know his young mind feels that you don’t love him enough.
- Cuddle him up to you so that he feels emotionally secure.
- Listen intently to what your child has to say. Don’t cut him short. It might be a trivial thing to you, but what he wants to say is very important to him.
Your husband is also duty bound to look after your child. So, when you feel tired he should look after the child.
Do you become a negligent mother if are ambitious about your career?
Not at all.
You have every right to be ambitious about your work. But you should know the trick of balancing between work and parenthood.
Most of you feel you have no time in hand to fulfill your duty as a loving mother and your duty as an efficient professional.
Nothing can be far from truth.
Time is in your hands.
Easy ways to balance between being a successful career woman and not negligent mother.
- Be time efficient. Managing your time is very important for you to enjoy emotional time with your child.
- Work with dedicated concentration.
- Focus on your work to finish it with proficiency.
- When at home be just a loving mother and wife. Your work can wait for the next day.
- Get up early in the morning. You will have loads of time in your hand.
- If at all you have very important work to finish, your husband should definitely take care of your child. He is duty bound to do it.
- Never use your mobile unnecessarily. It takes away the precious time you should be spending with your child.
- Make your husband accountable. He should definitely help you in household chores.
- Plan your household chores. Believe me; you will be amazed by the way it helps you to finish your day-to-day work real fast.
Conclusion
So, you can definitely be a loving and guilt free mother and a highly successful professional. God has presented you with the unique talent of multi-tasking which your husband is totally incapable of.
Deepika says
Mam, this is very helpful…
Thanks a lot 🙂
Mathi says
Deepika,
I am happy you found my post useful.
Sheenamae Tuquib says
I feel that I am a negligent mother to my son which is 9 months. when I was pregnant my dream is to takecare of son, to be a full time mother, suddenly my husband family don’t want me to stay at home they said that I nee to hep my husband for the financial needs.. I work in a BPO industry, telecommunication.. I was really disappointed to my self because I was not able to watch over my son growth and I feel I am so irresponsible bcause I don’t have time to see and takecare of him.. I have the time that im so jelous w/ the nani because my son love the nani than me.. I feel I was rejected as a mom, my son is my life I work because of him and his need but iwas so disappointed of myself because I feel I was not a good mother and never check my sons development..
Mathi says
Hi Sheenamae,
I think you are worrying unnecessarily. You are working for the betterment of your son. So don’t feel guilty about it. Your problem is applicable to all working women. You should know the trick to balance between your work and your role as a mother. When you are home, spend quality time with your son. Show that you love him by playing with him and listening to him.
Take away the thought that you are negligent mother. Because you are not.