Do you feel reviving love into your loveless marriage is impossible?
It is tough but not impossible.
You always want to bring back your old love into your now loveless marriage, don’t you?
But you are all at seas not knowing how to do it.
“Hi aunty” I turned when I heard the familiar voice.
It was Mythily, my friend’s daughter. She separated from her husband just a few years after her marriage.
I felt saddened that the young did not make any efforts to bring her marriage back to its track. I lost contact with her for a few years.
And now here she was.
I felt hesitant to ask about her married life as I didn’t want to kindle unwanted memories in the young girl.
But I need not have worried.
“Aunty I am back with my husband” Mythily smiled at me.
“Really Mythily I am happy for you” I hugged her.
“Aunty I made mistakes and my husband made mistakes. Both took our relationship mistakes too much to heart. We felt we were not made for each other. So, we felt it would better if we separated” Mythily went on.
“But after separating from my husband, I realized life alone was terrifying. I understood that I too had made many relationship blunders. And thinking back, I realized the good things about my husband. I knew I was being foolish in staying away from him. Both of us had a frank talk and now we are together” the young girl looked gleeful.
“Now we don’t make the past relationship mistakes. We have changed so much for the better that I thank God that I came to my senses” I felt happy for Mythily.
Can you see how Mythily made reviving old love into her loveless marriage possible?
You too can do it.
The love you have for each other in the initial days of your marriage is dreamlike and very exciting. You feel emotionally close to your spouse. You cannot imagine your life without him\her.
You think that the intensity of your love will never decrease. You assume that your excitement and pleasure of being together will persist all through your married life.
But you are disappointed when the thrill and delight you initially felt about your spouse slowly dying. You are no longer excited about your relationship. Your co-existence with your spouse slides from the heavenly to the routine and the mundane.
There seems nothing new in your interaction with your spouse. Your married life becomes a boring survival of listless and monotonous co- existence.
The never-ending family issues, the continuous relationship issues, and the incompatibility that develops with your spouse makes you depressed about the brevity of happiness in your marriage.
The stress of overcoming family problems drives you mad.
The monotony you face in your married life makes you feel bored. The differences of opinion you face with your spouse makes you feel resentful towards your spouse.
Your indifference gradually turns into apathy towards your spouse. Finally, your apathy makes you feel all love is lost in your relationship.
Why do you feel your marriage would not retrieve its old glory of love and excitement?
You cite many reasons for your loveless marriage.
- “We have drifted so far away from each other.”
- “The bitter words spoken have left a scar in our relationship.”
- “My spouse no longer wants to spend time with me.”
- “We seem to have nothing in common.”
Your reasons are valid and true. Reviving old love back into your loveless marriage is not an easy joke.
It needs incredible patience, understanding and perseverance to salvage your married life from its ruins.
Is it really possible to regain the old love in your married life?
- It is possible.
Can your married life vibrate with renewed love and care?
- It can.
Are you wondering how?
Have you seen the embers of fire?
You think that the fire had died. You assume that only the ashes remain. But when you kindle it you are astonished to see the sparkle of fire burning brightly.
It is the same with your married life.
Your loveless married life just needs rekindling.
Look back at the reasons behind your loveless marriage!
You too have been an active participant in the destruction of your marriage. You cannot escape the blame by pinpointing your spouse to be the sole reason behind your failed marriage. I am sure he\she too will have his\her own story of problems he\she faced with you.
Do you why you lose love in your marriage?
Have you seen a horse pulling a cart?
It has blinders around his eyes so that he is not distracted by what is happening around him. This is the way a horse can concentrate on the path he is riding.
You too interact with your spouse like a horse with blinders.
What was right for the horse is wrong for your marriage!
You must understand the viewpoint of your spouse.
You must not be concentrated on only you. Your spouse is an integral part of your life.
Like a horse with blinders you cannot travel in your own path. You have to combine with your spouse to travel through your married life.
Most of you feel saddened when your marriage struggles to find its foothold.
You just want to bring your old love back into your marriage.
“Yes, I would give anything to get back the happiness I lost in my marriage. I love my spouse. Is reviving old love into loveless marriage possible?”
Your worries are logical and reasonable. It is very difficult to rebuild a broken marriage. But it is not impossible. When both have the mindset to make your marriage work again, half the work is done.
How do certain couples make their marriage happy and fulfilled?
- They enjoy excellent friendship.
- They understand each other.
- They adjust to each other’s faults.’
- They have mutual respect.
- They support each other.
These are the simple tricks to bring love into your loveless marriage
Reviving love into your loveless marriage is definitely possible.
- The most important thing to do is to have a frank talk with your spouse about the mistakes both made in your marriage.
- Accept your faults and apologize for the hurt inflicted on your spouse.
- If your differences had been about financial dealings, decide how much each should contribute to the family financial commitments.
- Make a decision within yourself that you will not repeat relationship mistakes again. This is very important as the positive changes should come from within you. Unless you change inside, your marriage will face the same problems again and again.
- Accept your spouse as he\she is and never try to change him\her.
- Give each other enough spacing and freedom.
- Do not play the accusing game again.
- Be sportive.
- Be fun loving and humorous.
- Demonstrate your love openly.
- Be patient and tolerant.
- Learn the art of giving in.
- Do not bring back the old bitter memories into your revived married life.
- Let past be past and begin your married life afresh.
- Do not have prejudiced view about your spouse.
- Empathize with your spouse to understand him\her perfectly.
- Do not mind read your spouse from your angle.
Conclusion
“There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.” –Sarah Dessen
The embers of your love are always waiting to be stimulated. You just have to fan it with your new understanding love to make the embers burn brightly and energetically.
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