You are shocked when you see the signs of your marriage breaking up, don’t you?
You wonder what went wrong with your marriage.
You must initially understand that your marriage does not break up all of a sudden. There is a gradual decline in the quality of your relationship which you unknowingly ignored.
They are the warning signals that something is wrong with your married life.
But you chose to ignore these sure signs of your marriage breaking up as you are still not in terms with the negative things happening in your relationship.
It is a harsh fact that successful marriage has become a rarity in this modern society.
It is very common to see couples drifting away from each after a few years of marriage.
Why does this happen to modern marriages?
Modernity has robbed marriage of its freshness. Its true meaning is lost in the mayhem of never-ending demand for rights couples indulge in. when duties are discarded and ignored it is only natural that your relationship races towards its inevitable failure.
Yes!
When the demand for your marital rights is vociferous and the voice towards your duties is muted, your married life becomes very tense, hostile and aggressive.
Is the failure of your marriage sudden and unexpected?
It is not!
It is actually a snowballing effect!
Top 5 sure signs of your marriage breaking up!
1. You do not respect each other.
Mutual respect is essential for your marriage to work. High regard for your spouse does not mean that you are subservient to him\her.
When you truly love your spouse, you find it very natural to respect him\her.
What does respect in marriage mean?
- It is cherishing and loving your spouse for what he\she is.
- It is respecting the privacy of your spouse.
- It is your understanding his\her individual wishes.
- It is the freedom and liberty you give your spouse to fulfill his\her personal wishes.
Loss of respect for your spouse is a sure sign that your marriage is breaking up.
How?
- You demean your spouse.
- You deviate from your spouse, emotionally and physically.
- You do not support your spouse financially and psychologically.
- Whatever he\she does meets your ridicule.
- You pass uncalled for comments about your spouse before friends\relatives and inwardly gloat at his\her discomfort.
- Your spouse would not take your insults without a fight and he\she too give it back to you with vengeance.
You both indulge in mutual mud –slinging. A sure sign of a withering marriage.
2. You do not communicate with each other.
You communicate with friendliness when you love your spouse.
- When you are compatible you share your inner most feelings with your spouse.
- You understand each other perfectly well.
- There is immense sharing of happiness, love, respect and joy between you.
- You also share your problems with your spouse as you trust him\her to support you.
- Your friendly relationship with your spouse makes your interaction with him\her easy and effortless.
But you do not communicate when your marriage is breaking up.
How?
- You do not have anything to talk to each other. If at all you talk you fight.
- You do not discuss any family matters together.
- You do not consider your spouse as a part of family.
- Your friends circle is totally different from your spouse.
- You feel that you are superior to your spouse.
There is empty silence in your home as there is no loving communication between you.
3. You lose all interest in your spouse.
Do you know the best way to show your love for your spouse?
It is the essential ingredient called interest.
- Your interest in your spouse makes your relationship loving and caring.
- When there is mutual interest towards each other you make yourself presentable before your spouse.
- You have so much to talk to each other.
- You enjoy excellent compatibility.
- You are very encouraging and appreciative.
Your interest is the best compliment you could give your spouse. It deepens the love you have for one another.
Your lack of interest is the emphatic sign of your breaking marriage.
How?
- There is no combined togetherness between you.
- You lose interest in your appearance, a sure sign that you no longer care about your spouse.
- You lose interest in the work of your spouse as you do not care about his\her success.
- You lose interest in maintaining your home, a definite sign of a breaking marriage.
Your marriage becomes very uninteresting, boring and dull.
4. You are always edgy when you are with your spouse
- When you love your spouse deeply you do not harbor resentment and anger against him\her.
- You like the company of your spouse and totally enjoy your togetherness.
- When he\she is away you feel a vacuum within you. You feel completely lost without the presence of your spouse.
A breaking marriage makes the very presence of your spouse trigger resentment in you.
How?
- You do not like his\ her appearance.
- You hate his\her habits.
- You totally dislike being with your spouse.
- You find faults with your spouse with a sole intention of hurting him\her.
- You want to inflict your anger and frustration on him\her.
Your edgy attitude towards your spouse is a tell-tale implication that your marriage is a total failure.
5. You become secretive.
Will you be sneaky and secretive if you truly love your spouse?
- You do not have hidden secrets from your spouse.
- You are confident that your spouse will be supportive and compassionate if you confide your problems.
When your marriage is crumbling to dust you hide everything from your spouse.
How?
- Your spouse does not know about your whereabouts.
- You have friends about whom your spouse does not have any knowledge.
- Your spouse does not know about your financial status.
- You talk in undertone for hours in the mobile and your spouse never knows with whom.
- You go out with your colleagues\friends without your spouse knowing about it.
- You have extra marital flings without feeling guilty about it.
Conclusion
It is indeed sad you trample your relationship to nothingness by your indifferent attitude towards each other.
You are very emotional to treasure your spouse during the initial days of your marriage. But you fail to sustain the depth of your love after a few years of marriage.
Your marriage vows become meaningless when you let your married life drift towards failure. Never make your relationship loveless.
It is so easy to lose your marriage. But it is very tough to rebuild it. So, never ever let go your marriage by being mindless about nurturing it.
Always pay attention to the warning signals of your marriage fumbling towards failure before it becomes too late.
Anil Sahani says
Heartly thanks to mrs. Mathi Surendran.
You are the one of great author of LIFE IS GOOD.
I am feeling good and tension free.
I was confused from my marriage life, something going wrong. At last i got the reason and decison both.
Thank you
Mathi says
Anil,
Feeling happy you found my posts useful. There is nothing to fear about your married life. Love your spouse. Adjust to her minor faults. Respect her. Support her. Most of your marriage problems disappear.