Most of you yearn for a caring and daring husband, don’t you?
But you are frequently disappointed.
You often feel your husband is insensitive to your feelings. You also feel he is emotionally detached from you.
You want your husband to be more expressive in his interaction with you, don’t you?
Your husband is not very daring also. He often shies away from handling family issues. He lets you bear all the family problems by yourself.
You feel overburdened and overtaxed, don’t you?
You crave for him to shoulder family issues along with you.
Feel satisfied that you are not alone in wishing for a caring and daring husband.
It is a worldwide complaint almost all women have.
Yes.
A caring and daring husband does not seem to exist at all,does he?
Your common complaints about your husband
- My husband does not care for me.
- He is very stiff and deadpan when at home.
- He does not respond to my love and care.
- He shies away from family problems.
- He lets me slog alone with loads of household chores.
- He is glued to the laptop\ computer as if his life depended on it.
- He does not have direct eye contact with me.
- He only half listens when I talk with him.
This makes you wonder whether your husband loves you at all.
You have many emotional needs about your husband
- You want your husband to appreciate you.
- You want him to listen to you.
- You want him to share your household chores.
- You want him to communicate with love.
- You want him to be humorous and funny.
- You crave for open demonstration of love.
- You want him to buy things for you.
- You want him to be responsible.
- You want him to handle family problems along with you.
How many of you are blessed with such a caring and daring husband?
A negligible few, I am sure.
Is your husband really wooden and unfeeling as you think?
Is he a coward?
Not really!
The male world of your husband is totally different from your womanly world.
- Your life revolves around your family. To your husband family is just a part of his life.
- You always worry about your children, their future and the financial status of your family. Your husband lives for the day.
- You handle family issues deftly. He does not have the capacity to handle it.
- You have the energy to do your never ending household chores. Your husband is plain lazy to do any work when at home.
- You are brave when it comes to family issues. Your husband easily cracks under the pressure.
- You go towards family problems. He moves away from it.
Phew.
Very opposite to you, isn’t he?
The sad fact is that your husband is not well equipped to handle family life with your efficiency.
The differences between both in handling family issues
- You have the courage to handle any family problems. He does not.
- You have the patience to look after your children. He does not.
- You can multitask with competence. He can never hope to match you in this aspect.
- You plan ahead for the future of your family. Your husband does not look beyond today.
- You remember your family commitments like pending bills, your child’s school fees, the repayments and installments with pencil sharp memory power. He is ever forgetful.
- You have extraordinary management skills in dealing with all sorts of family issues. He is all at seas in managing the family.
He fails miserably when there are sudden emergency issues in the family. His inability makes him keep a safe distance from the nerve wracking family problems. He knows he is incapable whereas you are very capable.
You are irritated by his silence and seeming indifference towards family problems.
You want to yell and scream at him to be more responsible, don’t you?
You crumble inside in desperate anguish that he does not care for you.
You are angry when he does not appreciate you.
‘He can at least appreciate me so that I feel he values my contribution to the family’ you fume to yourself.
He does care for you, only he does not show it openly.
He is responsible and committed to the family, but he thinks his responsibility ends when he earns for the family.
He does appreciate you, only that he does not say it loudly.
He is totally dependent on you to handle family problems. He does not have the energy, patience and ability to tackle it.
Do you want to know the reason you cannot find a caring and daring husband?
The answer is very simple!
You might be weak physically. But your mental strength is as powerful and strong as iron. You easily handle family issues with confidence.
Your husband might be stronger than you physically. But he is very weak and fragile mentally and psychologically.
He cracks under pressure when there are extreme family problems.
‘Fine! Let him be what he is. But does my husband care and love me?’ You often break your head unable to know what he thinks of you.
Why is your husband silent and distant towards you?
Why is he tight-lipped when at home?
His seeming indifference is his defense mechanism.
Defense mechanism against what? You might wonder.
From your nagging.
Your husband is basically egoistic. He needs your respect. He wants you to make him feel that he is the head of the family.
But you make him feel inadequate in no uncertain terms.
You bruise his ego by comparing him with his more successful friends\colleagues. His male ego never accepts it.
So to shut out your words from hurting him he builds a fence of protection around him through his silence.
Why can’t he be daring?
He is indeed daring. He is very smart in his work and efficient in tackling work related problems. He is respected for his talent in his work place.
Why doesn’t he show the same prowess in handling problems in family also?
You see, dealing with work related problems is entirely different from handling family issues.
Work related problems needs knowledge, hard work and improvisation. He has lots of it.
But family problems need pure mental guts and common sense. He has nothing of it.
Work related problems are practical and rational. Your practical husband handles it with aplomb.
You need emotional intelligence to handle relationship problems. You need common sense, patience, and endless energy to look after the family.
You are just made for that.
Your husband is not built for that.
He has immense trust that you have incredible capacity to manage the family.
Inwardly he appreciates your smartness. He cannot do without you. He feels lost when you are not around. A caring and daring husband does exist silently. Not openly as you want to.
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