Does financial security in marriage mean happiness and bliss in your married life?
Most of you think that if you have tons of money there will be no relationship problems between you
No!
You are wrong.
It is a harsh fact that financial security in married life is very important.
Bitter truth about financial security in marriage
If you think financial security in marriage can make your relationship stable, you will be proved wrong.
The story of a young girl married to a rich family
“I feel completely dissatisfied with my married life” Shamala, my cousin’s daughter told me.
She was married into a very wealthy family. Her diamonds swanky cars and hordes of money was always a hot topic among our relatives.
So, it was assumed by us that she was very lucky to belong to the top crux of the society. And to hear her say, that she was dissatisfied with her marriage seemed a very strange thing.
“What is wrong, Shamala? I asked the young girl worryingly.
“Aunty, my in-laws are very shallow minded. They think their money makes them way above everyone. So, they do not respect my family. It makes my blood boil with anger, when I hear them say degrading words about my family” tears welled in the poor girl’s eyes.
“My husband does not love me. Initially, he was enamored by my beauty. But now, he feels he should have married a girl who belonged to his elite group. He does not take me to family functions. He never talks to me with love. I do not know why I felt that money could make me happy”, Shamala’s voice quivered in anger.
“My husband often tells me, that I have no class and that I was not up to his tall standards. Do you know how long for some understanding from him?” she sighed with abject unhappiness.
I was completely taken aback, when I heard the sad story of Shamala.
I too had thought, that Shamala was a lucky girl to have married into such a famous family. After hearing about her pathetic married life, I realized that money just gave you great buying power, and that it could never make you live a happy married life.
I am sure, most of you would disagree with me.
You feel that when you have money you can easily overlook many drawbacks in your marriage.
It is true that money makes you financially secure. It does give you great social status. In fact, without money your love for each other will beat a retreat.
But if you think money is enough to make you enjoy a good married life, you will be proved wrong.
Happiness in your relationship depends on many other more emotionally penetrating qualities.
- Love
- Compassion
- Compatibility
- Patience
- Tolerance
- Compromise
- Trust
Can your marriage survive without these beautiful qualities?
It definitely would not.
These are the qualities which gives you the most wanted ingredient in your married life- Emotional security
Yes!
Without emotional security, your relationship is doomed to fail.
Modern marriages fail because couples do not care about the emotional needs of each other. They have become so money minded, that they compare their mediocre life with others who have a better social status.
So, modern couples want more and more money to keep in pace with others.
Yes!
You never envy loving couples. But you envy affluent couples. You think financial security means happy married life. So, you run after money. You want to accrue the social status of your wealthy friends\relatives.
Both work yourself threadbare to maintain an enviable lifestyle.
You have heated interaction with your spouse about money. You are dissatisfied that there is no enough money in the family. So, you work yourself threadbare, to earn more and more money, so that you can enjoy a social status which will make your friends envy you.
Are you happy, after earning tons of money you so dreamed of?
You answer is a big no.
Why?
It is because in the process of seeking financial security, you never really catered to the emotional needs of your spouse. In your race after money, you forget the importance of emotional security in marriage. Your total focus is towards making your marriage money strong, and not love strong.
What is the role of money in your married life?
Colossal, I should say.
Without money, your self-respect is at stake. With money, you can decide how to lead your life on your own terms and conditions. You are your own master.
You need not run from pillar to post for your basic needs. You give the best education for your children. You have your own home. You have sumptuous bank balance for a rainy day.
Your standard of living is amazing. You possess all the flashy thing the world market has to offer.
You are envied for your swanky car. Your friends’ gape at your big bungalow. You are stared at with amazement for your trendy dresses.
Great status symbols, aren’t they?
Fine!
But can all these materialistic things bring happiness into your married life?
It cannot.
Though you are envied when you step out of your swanky car with your spouse, only you know about the uneasy silence that existed between you during your drive.
But you take care of your car than your spouse. You wipe it to a mirror like gloss. You take step back and admire it.
You never understand that cars cannot display love. It can only display your social status.
Why do you not show the same care to your spouse?
Your spouse is the one who going to share all the ups and downs of your life. He\she is the person who is going to travel along with you all through your life journey.
But you do not really care about making your spouse happy. You never care to spend quality time with your spouse. Your conversation with your spouse is invariably mundane and routine.
Can you see how your married life is robotic and mechanical, in spite of your financial security?
Is this the way your married life should be?
With lots of money, but without love.
You will never enjoy your relationship, when there is no emotional security. It is that important for your marital happiness.
How exactly can you bring in emotional security into your marriage?
Interact with friendliness with your spouse.
Never take your spouse for granted.
Be empathetic towards the feelings of your spouse.
Overlook his\her minor faults.
Be encouraging and appreciative.
Never ever degrade your spouse, before your friends and relatives.
Have enough spacing between you.
Never try to change your spouse according to your liking.
Practice patience and tolerance.
Trust your spouse.
Display your love frankly and openly.
Have transparency in your relationship.
Spend quality time together.
When the morale of your spouse touches a new low, boost his\her sagging confidence.
When you embed these qualities into your married life, the emotional security it gives you is worth tons of gold.
Conclusion
Can you see how you need emotional security and financial security to enjoy a happy marriage?
Yes!
You cannot survive through your marriage with only emotional security. You need money to exist in this harsh world.
Lack of money has a definite adverse effect on your emotional security.
So, blend both into your married life. Seek a balanced combination of financial security and emotional security.
Finally, which wins the race?
Financial security in marriage or emotional security in marriage?
Though the scale is near about equal, the needle tilts slightly towards emotional security, as marriage is all about emotions and not about currency.
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