When you are living in a toxic relationship, your life becomes one big torture.
It is because, your married life means a lot to you. Your marriage bonds you with a person, whom you ardently love.
During your love days, you are confirmed that your spouse is the person for you. And your spouse shows only his or her best side to you, during your dating days. Both spend your time, chitchatting about your love, your marriage and your life together.
Everything about your spouse seems perfect to you. And you build castles in the air, of a dreamy relationship where nothing can go wrong between you. When you marry your spouse, you feel you are luckiest person in the world.
The initial months of your marriage confirm that your spouse is the perfect person you dreamed him or her to be. But as months pass by, you have an inkling that something is wrong with your relationship.
Your spouse does not seem the person, whom you loved and cherished. Your spouse displays many characteristics which you never knew existed in him or her.
Your married life also, is not what you dreamed it to be. Instead of being full of love and laughter, it is full of uneasiness and uncomfortable feeling that all is not good about your spouse.
Initially, you do not realize that you are living through a toxic relationship.
Your love for your spouse is that intense, that you fail to notice the tell-tale signs that he or she is wrecking your happiness. Only very late do you understand that your spouse is toxic.
And that your relationship itself is toxic.
Yes.
You are naturally devastated.
Because of the toxicity of your spouse, you feel your freedom restricted, your individuality crushed and your love ignored by him or her. When your married life becomes toxic, you are unable to enjoy a single moment of it.
The continuous abuse of your emotions by your spouse, makes you feel uneasy in your married life.
You should understand that the uneasiness you feel about your married life is the result of the toxic behavior of your spouse.
Shall we now have a look at the 6 signs that clearly show that you are living in a toxic relationship?
The no 1. sign of a toxic relationship is being controlled
Your relationship with your spouse should be easy and comfortable. You must have the freedom to be yourself.
You should be able do things the way you like. Your marriage does not in any way curtail your right to be the individual you are.
But in your toxic relationship, you are in total control of your toxic spouse.
- Your money is controlled.
- Your total life is controlled.
- Your friend’s circle is decided by your toxic spouse.
When your spouse takes control of your life, you do not have the freedom to fulfill even the basic wishes you might have.
Not having liberty to do things your way, makes you feel very unhappy in your relationship.
The no 2. sign of a toxic relationship is always being asked an explanation
You are an adult, with your own individuality. You are bound to be different from your spouse.
So, you will do things your way. You also have your own work to do.
But in your toxic relationship, your toxic spouse questions you for almost everything. Not only this, you are made to explain each and every action of yours.
- You are asked an explanation when you are late from work.
- You are asked an explanation when you go out on your own.
- You are questioned about your whereabouts.
You tolerate this unwanted intrusion into your personal zone, to save your marriage. But you are furious when your toxic spouse is not satisfied with your explanation.
You feel like a school going child, when you are asked needless probing questions by your toxic spouse.
The no 3. sign of a toxic relationship is being accused
In your toxic relationship, your toxic spouse could do no wrong. Whatever family issue you might face, you are accused as the reason behind it.
- If there is a money problem in your family, you are accused as being the reason for it.
- If there is a relationship issue between you, you are reason for it.
- Your spouse keeps on accusing you, as though he or she is perfect.
And that you are completely imperfect. You fume helplessly in anger, at this unjustified accusation of your spouse.
The no 4. Sign of a toxic relationship is being denied freedom
When you are in a toxic relationship, you cannot do a thing without seeking the permission of your spouse.
- You cannot go shopping on your own.
- You cannot make a decision of your own.
- You cannot deal with your hard-earned money on your own.
When you are denied your basic freedom, you feel jailed in your relationship.
The no 5. Sign of a toxic relationship is the one-sided responsibility you face
Marriage is always a combined responsibility between you and your spouse.
You must do your family duties. Your spouse must do his or her family duties. Whenever there is a family issue, both must put you head together to solve it.
This is what a normal married life is all about.
- But in your toxic relationship, your toxic spouse coolly withholds himself or herself from any responsibilities your family might face.
- It is as though; your toxic spouse feels that you are the only one who should shoulder all family responsibilities.
- And that he or she must be let loose from any of your family issues.
A toxic behavior you feel impossible to bear.
The no 6. Sign of a toxic relationship is not accepting being in the fault
When you are living in a toxic relationship, your spouse acts as though he or she can do no wrong.
All wrong things happening in your relationship because of you, so your spouse feels. You are mad at your spouse for being so unreasonable and toxic.
But you feel completely tied up and helpless. You do not want to wreck your marriage by giving it back to your toxic spouse.
Being too patient when your spouse acts toxic, and makes your relationship toxic, is a mistake you should never make.
Everything has its limits. Your patience also has its limits. You should be tolerable only to a level.
Being too pliable when your spouse is toxic, will only give him or her a long leash to continue abusing your self-respect.
Retaliate against your toxic spouse when you must. Confront when the toxic situation in your relationship gets a little too much.
Did you now understand the clear signs that your relationship with your spouse is toxic?
Safeguard your mental peace, by protecting yourself from being attacked by the toxic behavior of your spouse.
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